Infant Adoption Guide

IAG 007: Adoption advertising and networking: An interview with Hal Kaufman of MyAdoptionAdvisor.com [Podcast]

Posted on 14. Jun, 2013 by Tim.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 44:57 — 62.7MB)

In this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast, we talk with Hal Kaufman about domestic adoption advertising, networking and use of the internet in your adoption journey.

Hal is an adoptive dad (two domestic infant adoptions) and the founder of MyAdoptionAdvisor.com. Since 2008, he has worked with hundreds of adopting parents who are pursuing domestic infant adoption, helping them connect with expectant parents.

After years of infertility and tragic losses, Hal and his wife were matched with each of their children’s birth families in just 4 months from the time they were approved to adopt. Through MyAdoptionAdvisor.com Hal brings his unique experiences and specially designed training to help you better understand the domestic adoption process, anticipate bumps in the road, and adopt more quickly.

Hal will help create your adoption website and profile. He can even run an online advertising campaign to drive relevant traffic to your website. 

In this episode you’ll learn about:

• Hal’s story on how he became an adoptive dad.
• What MyAdoptionAdvisor is and how they can help you.
• How the internet has changed (and still is changing) the domestic adoption world.
• What open adoption means to Hal.
• How to better avoid potential adoption fraud and scams.
• Tips on how you can have a faster and successful domestic adoption.
• AND MUCH MORE!

Links discussed in this episode:

• MyAdoptionAdvisor.com 
• MyAdoptionAdvisor.com Overview of Services
• MyAdoptionAdvisor.com Frequently Asked Questions 

   

• Adoption scams – what they are and how to avoid them

• Top 5 Reasons Why Prospective Adoptive Parents Should Spread the Word Themselves

• The Infant Adoption Guide Podcast on iTunes

To learn more, you can contact Hal by clicking here or call him at 612-801-6896 or email him at [email protected].

Question: What do you think about domestic adoption advertising and networking? Click here to leave your comment below.

Click here to subscribe to the podcast in iTunes. If you like what you hear, please leave an honest review in iTunes. Thanks!

Listen in iTunes: 

Listen in Stitcher: 

Continue Reading

IAG 006: Adoption Agency Review: An interview with Shawn Kane of American Adoptions [Podcast]

Posted on 02. Jun, 2013 by Tim.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:21 — 85.2MB)

In this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast, we talk with Shawn Kane – adoptive dad and the Executive Director of American Adoptions, which is a full service adoption agency that works with adoptive couples and birthparents nationwide.

They are one of the largest domestic adoption agencies in the U.S. – and they complete more than 300 domestic adoptions every year. 99% of the adoptions are healthy newborns.

In this episode, you’ll learn about:

• Shawn’s story of how he and his wife recently adopted their child.
• Open adoption – what it means and some practical advice for those who are unsure if they want an open adoption.
• What makes American Adoptions different than other agencies.
• What the average wait time is for couples who work with American Adoptions.
• What an adoption video profile is and how it can benefit you.
• And MUCH MORE!

Links discussed in the show:

• AmericanAdoptions.com
• AmericanAdoptionsBlog.com
• American adoptions has a birthmother scholarship program that helps pay for college or other school tuition and books.
• InfantAdoptionGuide.com/4 National Adoption Agencies - blog post about 4 adoption agencies that work with families from all over the U.S.
• Infantadoptionguide.com/AdoptionAgencies - learn more about adoption agencies.
• The Infant Adoption Guide Podcast on iTunes.

What makes American Adoptions different than other agencies: 

• Families can set an adoption budget so that they will only be matched with a birth mother whose needs do not exceed their adoption budget. 
• If a birth mother changes her mind and decides not to pursue an adoption plan, American Adoptions offers a limited financial risk program, which covers families who have already paid medical, legal or living expenses before the disruption.
• Unique and personal adoption print and video profiles that help families get matched faster & with less risk for disruption.
• Click here to learn more about why families choose American Adoptions. 

For information regarding services or to request an adoption information kit, click here or you can contact them at 1-800-ADOPTION or email [email protected].

Question for you: What do you look for when researching domestic adoption agencies? Click here to enter your comments below.

To listen and subscribe to the podcast in iTunes, click on the icon: 

To listen and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher, click on the icon: 

Continue Reading

Adoption Book Review: My Paper Pregnancy Journal PLUS 5 reasons you should write down your adoption story

Posted on 27. May, 2013 by Tim.

Have you thought about how you could write down your adoption story?

Delana H. Stewart, author of the adoption book Nine Year Pregnancy, has put together My Paper Pregnancy Journal – which is full of prompts, quotes, inspiration, and plenty of space to write about your adoption journey.

When my wife and I went through our two domestic adoptions, we wrote down lots of milestones and captured our thoughts – but usually in a day planner or on the computer. While we did a good job writing down all of the important things, we could have used My Paper Pregnancy Journal to help us organize our thoughts.

Before I get into my review of My Paper Pregnancy Journal – I want to give you my 5 reasons why should you write down your adoption story.

1. Remember the details (the small stuff)

Writing your story down as you live through it – or even shortly after – will help you remember those little details that may seem insignificant at the time, but are gems that you can fondly look back on. Months after our first adoption story, I was surprised how many little details I forgot until I went back and read them.

2. Relieve stress (also known as: vent!) 

The adoption process can be a roller coaster ride – all of the ups and downs can get you stressed out. So it is far better to write it all out than to suffer a headache from banging it into a wall (maybe just a little overdramatic – but not much). 

3. Keep track of important dates   

When you decided to adopt – when you began your homestudy – the day you were matched…writing down the date and even the time (like when you got “the call”) will help you remember exactly when these important events happened.

4. Recall (and tell) important stories

Stories about how you made it through each step will be very valuable later on – when you can share them with your child. You are bound to have some special stories – some fun ones and maybe some kinda painful ones. These are what your child will want to hear about when you tell their adoption story.

5. Great way to stop, think, and reflect

When my wife and I were writing down our thoughts and experiences during our adoption journeys, it allowed us to talk about the events as they happened. This is particularly important during the days when you first meet the birthparents or the first day you meet your child. My Paper Pregnancy Journal is filled with great questions and thoughts to help you reflect and write about your story.

My Paper Pregnancy Journal uniquely uses the stages of pregnancy to help you go through your adoption journey:

First Trimester:

• Conception (when your adoption journey begins)
• Expecting (when you are researching what kind of adoption you want to pursue)
• Heartbeat (begin to wait)

Second Trimester:

• False contractions (bumps in the road and setbacks – anything that causes you to worry or grieve)
• Bed Rest (if you have a long wait time)

Third Trimester:

• Contractions (you are matched!)
• Labor (final waiting time – for placement)
• Delivery (placement – bring your baby home!)

The journal concludes with a section called Being a Parent that helps you chronicle a lot of your child’s “firsts”. Finally, the appendix has some questions for you to consider before adopting along with challenges you may face after adopting.

I love how Delana puts in some extra things into the journal including: well timed verses and quotes, recommended adoption books, and parts of her own adoption story as she writes in her book Nine Year Pregnancy.

I recommend getting both her of books – My Paper Pregnancy Journal and Nine Year Pregnancy. 

As you take the time to detail every part of your adoption story, you will write about the good and the bad days – maybe even have a few tear stained pages.

The journal will ultimately be a treasure for you and your family. It will show your child how very, very much they were wanted. 

QUESTION FOR YOU:  Have you written your adoption story into a journal?  Let us know by clicking here and entering your comments below.

Continue Reading

IAG 005: Adoption Agency Review: An interview with Mardie Caldwell from Lifetime Adoption Center [Podcast]

Posted on 09. May, 2013 by Tim.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 50:05 — 69.7MB)

In this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast we talk with Mardie Caldwell, COAP (Certified Open Adoption Practitioner), CEO and Founder of Lifetime Adoption Center.

Mardie is a nationally recognized adoption expert. She is the author of 7 books (soon to be 8) which include AdoptingOnline.com, Adoption: Your Step-By-Step Guide, and Called to Adoption. 

She has been dedicated to bringing couples and birthparents together since 1986. She has struggled through infertility and the loss of 7 pregnancies. Her most important title – adoptive mom.

In this episode, you’ll find out about:

• Mardie’s domestic adoption story about how she became an adoptive mother
• How Mardie went on to start Lifetime Adoption Center
• Tips from Mardie on how to get past open adoption fears
• How the Lifetime Foundation helps support birthparents
• Advice for anyone who may be just starting to look into adoption
• Mardie’s Mother’s Day stories
• And MUCH MORE!

Here are the links that we discuss in the show…

• InfantAdoptionGuide.com/adoptionagencies -for more information about domestic adoption agencies.
• Lifetime Adoption Center FAQ frequently asked questions page - for more information about Lifetime.
• Lifetime Foundation- a non-profit charity helping birthparents with basic needs as well as educational scholarships 
• Mother’s Day Special of the TV show Marie (on the Hallmark channel -hosted by Marie Osmond) where Mardie was a guest along with Nia Vardalos (My Big Fat Greek Wedding – and new author of INSTANT MOM).

Click on the iTunes logo to subscribe to the podcast.

Click on the Stitcher logo to subscribe to the podcast.

QUESTION: What research ideas do you have in finding the right adoption agency?

Click here to leave your answer in the comments below.

Continue Reading

18 Money Saving Tips For Domestic Adoption Travel

Posted on 04. May, 2013 by Tim.

The costs for domestic infant adoption in the U.S. can be overwhelming – especially if you have to travel to another state.

Once you are matched and know where you are traveling to, you can save money with some research and preparation.

My wife and I have adopted twice – both times from other states. We made some mistakes and learned from our travel experiences. Here are the 18 Tips that will save you money on domestic adoption travel:

Adoption baby bag tips.

• Carry it on with you. Most airlines will allow you to carry on a diaper bag in addition to your normal carry on items – even if you don’t have the baby yet. This will allow you to save money on extra checked baggage.
• Buy most of what you need when you get there. If your baby bag is full after you finish packing – ask yourself, ‘Do we really need to travel with all this stuff or can we pick up what we need when we get there.’ This may not save you money, but bringing less with you will save your arms from lugging it around the airport. [...]

Continue Reading

IAG 004: An Adoption Story – an interview with adoptive parents Josh & Laci [Podcast]

Posted on 15. Apr, 2013 by Tim.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:24:10 — 116.6MB)

CLICK HERE or on the PLAY button above to listen right now.

In this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast you’ll hear the adoption story from new adoptive parents Josh and Laci – and how they adopted their little boy in early 2013!

They share the ups and the downs of their adoption journey – and what it was like to adopt a newborn from the other end of the United States.

In this episode, you’ll find out about:

• Josh and Laci’s domestic adoption story
• Why they went on the Price Is Right game show to raise money for their adoption
• Tips from Josh and Laci on how to talk with a birthmother
• What it is like to be matched with a birthmother
• Some of biggest obstacles they had to overcome
• What it was like to adopt a newborn from the other side of the country
• And MUCH MORE!

CLICK HERE (or on the iTunes logo) to subscribe & listen to the podcast in iTunes.

CLICK HERE (or on the logo) to listen to it on Stitcher.

Your Feedback

If you have a topic that you would like me to talk about on an upcoming episode, send me an e-mail.

For more stories, please check out my post domestic adoption stories to inspire you.

As we talk about in the podcast, Laci is a graphic artist and she creates adoption profiles. Her website www.LaciMorganCreations.com shows you her “Made With Love” adoption profiles – she can help you create your adoption profile so go check it out!

Question: What other questions do you have about adoption fundraising? You can leave a comment by clicking here.

Thanks for listening!

Continue Reading

How to adopt: What is the first step to start your domestic adoption journey?

Posted on 04. Apr, 2013 by Tim.

The adoption process can be very overwhelming. It is hard to know where to start. 

Before you begin your adoption journey, you must first understand how the process works and what your options are.

But don’t worry – if you are just starting to look into what adoption is all about and you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember this:

You are NOT alone. 

I have been in your shoes and I want to help break down the process to make it easier. So, to get started – you simply need to take the first step.

You see, back in 2006 my wife and I took our first step on our adoption journey. We had to answer some questions about how we wanted to build our family. Some of these were easy to answer, and others took some time and lots of discussion.

Here are the questions that helped us decide what kind of domestic adoption we wanted. 

1. Do we want to adopt a newborn?

This question was easy for us. We knew on both of our adoptions that we wanted to adopt a newborn – so this is the biggest reason why we chose domestic adoption.

2. What age or age range do we prefer?  

Adoption agencies and attorneys will ask your preferences for how old of a child you would like to adopt, so this question is one you have to tackle.

3. Do we want to adopt a boy or a girl (or does it matter to you)?

Choosing one or the other is OK if it is the right decision for your family – just understand that it may extend your wait time a bit. Also, there are always cases where the doctor thinks the baby will be a boy or a girl – and then we find out they are wrong once the baby is born.

4. Should we adopt from another state (which involves more money/time off of work/etc.)?

There are 2 points to this question:

1. If you open up your options to adopt from outside your home state, it increases your reach to more potential birthparents which can reduce the time is takes to match and have a baby placed with you.

2. It can cost you more money to adopt from another state. You will have to have an attorney from the sending and receiving state, and you will have to travel and stay in the state where the birthparents are until ICPC guidelines are satisfied.

Answering this quesiton also depends on the area that you live in – if you are in a highly populated city & state then there is a greater chance of matching with birthparents in your state.

My wife and I live in a less populated state, so we adopted from other states on our first two adoptions. It significantly shortened our waiting time because we were open to matching with birthparents from anywhere in the U.S.

5. Does race matter to us when we consider adopting a child into our family?

This is an important one to consider – and for your whole family to be on the same page. For help with this, check out the great articles and blogs that Adoptive Family magazine has about trans-racial adoption.

6. How open are you to having an ongoing relationship with birthparents?

In most newborn adoptions, the birthparents select the adoptive parents. Better than 50% of the time, they also meet in person. 

According to the Adoption Institute, it has also become increasingly common for birth and adoptive families to have some form of direct contact after placement. This is called “open adoption,” but the degree of openness can vary significantly.

Birth and adoptive parents may meet before the adoption is finalized and have no further contact, or the families may maintain some level of ongoing contact throughout the child’s life, such as exchanging photos or letters or having face-to-face meetings.

7. How much money do you have (or will you have) to adopt?

According to Adoptive Families magazine, domestic adoptions can cost anywhere from $20,000 to $40,000. I have some resources on InfantAdoptionGuide.com to help you with adoption costs.

It is a great idea to prepare an adoption budget. Be sure you are realistic on how much time you’ll need in order to save enough money so you are prepared to have a child placed with you.

8. Do we need someone to hold our hands through the process?

Some agencies do a lot more to help you get through every step along the way. Others are there for you but do not have the staff or the resources to hold your hand as much.

For example, agency A is “full service” because they provide you with everything from the home study to attorneys to birthmother search/screening. Agency B is not full service because you will have to do more of the leg work yourself, such as finding an attorney or getting your home study completed.

One is not necessarily better than the other – you need to find out what is best for you.

For some help with this one, check out my resource links at the end of this post. 

9. How do we handle potential adoption scams?

Sadly, there are women posing as birthmothers who will call and tell you their sad story and how they are willing to give you their baby – if you are willing to help her with money. Many times, it is difficult for adoptive parents to tell if it is a scam.

This is true especially when they are not asking for money because it is an emotional scam. While you may be able to save money by not paying someone to screen potential birthmothers, it is much more risky.

In my opinion, you should have a trusted and well-trained professional that is not emotionally involved in your adoption situation to handle birthmother screening. Most agencies will do the screening for you.

I think that because adoptive parents are obviously emotionally involved (aka – we want to be parents as soon as possible) we cannot objectively find out if the expectant mother is really pregnant and not trying to scam us – because it does happen.

Click here for some good articles about adoption fraud/scams. Click here for more articles. 

10. How long will we have to wait?

There are surveys which show that most adoptive families successfully adopt within two years of starting. This depends on how long it takes for you to match with a birthmother. A lot of factors go into it, such as how well you present yourself to expectant mothers.

But here is what it all boils down to - somewhere out there an expectant mother believes adoption is the best choice for her baby and now she is looking for the perfect family – which is you.

If you’ve made it through these questions – Congratulations! You’ve completed the first step and you are on your way to building your family through domestic adoption! Now you can go to the next step – finding the right adoption agency/professional.

Here are some resources:

• To start researching and finding the right adoption professional for you:
  • IAG Podcast Episode #2: How to select the right adoption agency for you 
  • 12 Questions for adoption professionals (you can download and/or print this)
  • Agency or Facilitator?
  • 4 Agencies that work with families from anywhere in the U.S.  
  • 3 Adoption agencies with little upfront costs
  • 4 domestic adoption agencies with sliding scale fees  
• Read my blog post titled “6 Things We Would Have Done Differently On Our First Adoption” which will give you some tips on things you can do on your first adoption journey.
• Click Here to read some facts about domestic infant adoption from The Adoption Institute.

QUESTION: Where are you on your adoption journey? Have you started? Click here to enter your comments below.

Continue Reading

IAG 003: Adoption fundraising – an interview with CoupAide.com Founder Matt Lee [Podcast]

Posted on 24. Mar, 2013 by Tim.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 29:53 — 21.4MB)

In this episode I talk with Matt Lee, Founder of CoupAide.com - a unique fundraising platform for adoptive families who want to raise extra money for their adoption.Matt and I discuss how CoupAide.com helps adoptive families. Here is what it does:

CoupAide provides your supporters (family, friends, anyone you want) with a useful and valuable incentive in return for their contribution to your adoption fundraising campaign. Each time a supporter donates $20, they instantly receive a $50 Restaurant.com e-gift certificate good to over 18,000 restaurants nationwide. Then, you the adoptive family collects $10 for each e-gift certificate sold!

In this episode, you’ll find out about:

• Exactly how CoupAide.com works for you 
• How you can get started today! 
• How you can get supporters to buy e-gift certificates or physical gift cards
• How much money you can expect to raise for your adoption
• Check out CoupAide.com’s Adoption Fundraising Guide
• And MUCH MORE!

CLICK HERE to listen and download the podcast.

CLICK HERE to subscribe to the podcast in iTunes.

Your Feedback

If you have a topic that you would like me to talk about on an upcoming episode, send me an e-mail.

For more information about adoption fundraising, please check out my post How to fundraise for your adoption without spending your own money.

Question: What other questions do you have about adoption fundraising? You can leave a comment by clicking here.

Thanks for listening!

Continue Reading

5 Tips for Surviving the Adoption Wait

Posted on 06. Mar, 2013 by Tim.

You know the old saying “good things come to those who wait”?

For most of us who are trying to build our family through adoption – we have a hard time grasping this. Every day that we wait for our baby feels like forever. We so badly want to be parents, and it is soooo tough to wait.

As my wife and I went through our first adoption journey to adopt our baby girl, we struggled with waiting. We had waited so long and had been through so much to be able to start our family.

But we did it – and you can too!  

Now that we’ve adopted a second time, I want to share what we’ve learned about getting through the wait.

The following are 5 of the 25 tips we’ve found for surviving the adoption wait. The good news is…you can get ALL 25!

You only have to enter your name and email address on this page (either on the sidebar or below this post) and I’ll send you the complete list that you can print, save, or email.

5 (of 25) Tips For Surviving The Adoption Wait

1. Make a keepsake for your future child.

My wife likes to crochet (and she’s really good at it), so she made a special baby blanket for both of our children. You can use your talents to create a special keepsake.

Click here to read about how one adoptive mother made a special quilt even though she had never quilted before.

The process of making a special keepsake – just like the domestic adoption process – can be one of love, patience, perseverance, and determination.

2. Setup a Facebook page for your adoption profile.

There are over 500 million daily Facebook users. When you set up your own Facebook page telling the world about your desire to adopt, it is a very powerful way to connect with potential birthparents.

Click here to see my post about how to use Facebook for your adoption journey.

3. Find a reputable adoption attorney.

You will need an attorney for ICPC and finalization. I recommend finding one from the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys. This is a national association of approximately 340 attorneys throughout the U.S. and Canada who are experienced in the complexities of adoption law as well as interstate regulations.

The Academy is the largest and most accessible resource for finding an adoption attorney.

4. Learn about birthmothers.

Here are some articles where you can learn more about birthmothers:

Things I Wish All Adoptive Parents Knew (from a Birthmother’s point of view)

How to have that first birthmother conversation

10 simple gifts you could give

My top 5 birthmother blogs

5. Create a video about how you are preparing for your child.

Put together a video that captures your thoughts and feelings while you are on your journey. You will treasure this when your child is older and can see what you went through while you waited for them to become part of the family.

For example – you could show how you have set up the nursery, how you put together your profile, and even interview family & friends about what they were doing to get ready. It would be pretty cool to someday watch the video together with your child.

If you like these 5 tips – go get the other 20 tips for FREE! 

You only have to enter your name and email address on this page (either on the sidebar or below this post) and I’ll send you the complete list that you can print, save, or email.

QUESTION: What do you think? What are some tips that you have to survive the adoption wait? Email me or click here to leave your comment.

Continue Reading

The AdoptionApp Review

Posted on 12. Feb, 2013 by Tim.

There is a new adoption app for iPods, iPads, iPhones and Android phones that helps you on your adoption journey.

The AdoptionApp was created by Sharon Simons of MomAtLast.com. She is an adoptive mom who found herself having difficulty navigating her way through the Adoption Process. This provided the inspiration for her to create this mobile organizer & resource guide to help adoptive families.

When I recently downloaded the AdoptionApp to my iPhone, I knew this was something the adoption community needed. I want to provide you with this app review so you can learn about it, download it, and start using it to help you on your journey.

It is simple to use – it helps families stay organized through the entire process – and it provides some great adoption resources.

This mobile app will guide you through the many steps & tasks that need to be completed before your Domestic or International Adoption is approved.

Here’s what the AdoptionApp will do:

• Give you detailed information & documentation on the home study process for both Domestic & International Adoption.
• Keeps you organized with detailed checklists of tasks & documentation that needs to be completed for your Domestic or International Adoption.
• Gives you a ton of resources to keep you informed throughout your adoption journey.
• Provides a handy calendar that allows you to sync it with your already existing calendar to keep you on time for all of your Adoption related meetings & appointments.
• Lets you read articles & success stories about adoption, motherhood & more.

Click here to read FAQ’s about the AdoptionApp.

Click here to watch the AdoptionApp demo video.

Here’s what I like about the app:

1. The Adoption Checklist. It provides home study checklist details and allows you add or delete anything so you can make the checklist customize-able to your adoption process. I went in and added a check for completing our adoption profile.

It also provides links to those items in your checklist that you need help finding information to complete. For example, under the Criminal Background Check in the HomeStudy Checklist, there is a link to find out how to get your background check completed in your home state.

2. The Adoption Resources page. This includes several great adoption sites – including my very own InfantAdoptionGuide.com!

3. The Calendar function. This is really cool since it will sync up to my iPhone calendar where I can add reminders, notes, and alerts.

I’m sure that by now you are wondering about only one thing…the COST.

As of writing this post, the app is $4.99 in the iTunes Store. This is worth it when you consider how much time you can save. Go get it and you’ll be happy with it.

QUESTION: What do you think about the AdoptionApp?  Email me or you can leave a comment by Clicking Here.

Continue Reading