Ask an adoption question #4: How do we not feel rejected & lose hope when waiting to adopt?

Posted on 27. Jun, 2014 by .


In today’s “Ask An Adoption Question”, Shelly talks about her struggle with waiting to adopt.

Hi, Tim
The hardest thing for me is the waiting. Every day that passes feels like I have been rejected by all the people who look at our 3 websites. I think I’m not pretty enough to be chosen, our pictures aren’t good enough. It was extremely hard to go through gathering all the paperwork and cleaning our home again preparing for our second home study. Feels like what’s the point – losing hope we’ll ever be matched.


Hi, Shelly!

Thanks for your email. I know the waiting part of the adoption process is the worst. My wife and I have been through tough waiting periods during both of our adoptions.

It just plain sucks – no glamorous words here. Waiting will test your resolve for how bad you want to become parents. There were many times that our hopes were running really thin. [...]

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3 flights, 33 hours and 9,000 miles to become an adoptive dad

Posted on 19. Jun, 2014 by .


The following is a guest post from Darin Moss. He shares his incredible story of how he and his wife recently adopted a little boy and how he was able to celebrate Father’s Day in a special way. Enjoy!

Darin with his wife and newly adopted son

I’m sleep deprived…

I go days without a shave…

I’ve been pooped on, peed on, spit up on, and screamed at… And that’s just in one afternoon…

And I’m the happiest I’ve ever been…

I’m the new dad of a 14 week old little boy. 

After nearly two years with our adoption agency awaiting “The Call”, the daily anxious anticipation was gone, the frantic checking of caller ID with every phone call had stopped long ago, and the cool factor of the adoption wait had long since worn off.   [...]

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IAG 022: How to adopt faster and easier with Thea Ramirez – founder of

Posted on 12. Jun, 2014 by .


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In this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast, we talk with Thea Ramirez – the Founder and President of

IAG 022 an interview with Thea Ramirez of Adoption Share

What would it mean to you if there was a way to connect directly with over 80 adoption agencies and attorneys nationwide that are constantly posting adoption situations just for you?

Where do I sign up, right? 

This is exactly what does every day.

On today’s show, I chat with Thea Ramirez of She’ll talk about how you can adopt faster and easier by becoming a part of this growing online membership site.

If you are tired of waiting with no match and are losing hope – or even if you’ve just started the adoption process, you need to check out [...]

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The forgotten part of domestic adoption: Birthfathers

Posted on 06. Jun, 2014 by .

father and childs hands

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici /

Domestic infant adoption always involves a birthmother, adoptive parents, and of course – the baby. There are times when an important member of the adoption story is forgotten. Birthfathers (also known as first fathers) can get overlooked or left out. 

In today’s adoption world (at least in the United States), most domestic infant adoptions are considered “open adoptions” – meaning there is some level of continuing contact between birthparents and adoptive parents.

Quick adoption terminology check: the fathers should be referred to as expectant fathers before parental rights are relinquished or terminated. They are only considered birthfathers after they relinquish rights.

So why are the fathers often left out of the adoption picture?

It could be a number of reasons. Maybe it is by his choice. Maybe the expectant mother or birthmother knows where he is but doesn’t want him involved for whatever reason.

As one birthfather wrote on his blog, “maybe it’s because many birthfathers are afraid to try to stay in the lives of their children placed for adoption, convinced by society that the “best” thing for them to do is forget about that child. Some of them might find the effort required to stay a part of their children’s lives is too hard. Others may feel the stigma of being written off as nothing more than a sperm donor.”

What I want to bring to light is something not often thought about. There are situations when the expectant father (or birthfather) wants to be involved, he wants to know who will be parenting his child, and he wants to know his child is loved and cared for.  [...]

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IAG 021: My Adoption Storybook with adoptive dad Keith Miller

Posted on 29. May, 2014 by .


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In this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast, we talk with adoptive dad Keith Miller – the creator of My Adoption Storybook.IAG021 MyAdoptionStorybook with Keith Miller

Over the past few years, my wife and I have bought several children’s books about adoption that we have read to our little ones. We like the books because they help us tell our kids about adoption.

The problem with most of these books is that they tell someone else’s story. Every adoptive family has their own story to tell. Our two kids definitely have their own stories.

It would be so nice to read the storybook of how our kids became part of our family – maybe even with their own name in the book!

That is the idea Keith had when creating My Adoption Storybook.

This book is so different than anything I’ve seen before. It lets you customize and personalize it to tell your child’s adoption story – including your child’s name, your photos and text. The book is filled with wonderful illustrations that work perfectly with your story. [...]

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Ask an adoption question #3: What are some suggestions for advertising our adoption through social media (other than Facebook)?

Posted on 24. May, 2014 by .


In today’s “Ask An Adoption Question”, Karen asks about how to use social media to advertise about their desire to adopt.askanadoptionquestion3

Hi, Tim
What are some suggestions for advertising for our adoption other than Facebook and Craigslist that has been working in this world of social media?


Hi, Karen!

I love this question because it tells me you don’t want to sit back and wait for something to happen on your adoption journey. Trying new ways to make a connection and match with an expectant mother will help bring home your little one that much faster.

Based on your question, it sounds like you’ve already used Facebook and Craigslist. Facebook is arguably the best (and definitely the biggest) social media tool you can use to let the world know that you want to adopt. I have written an article about how to use Facebook for your adoption networking.

Let’s clarify what “social media” means. Social media refers to tools we use to communicate using the internet. This includes social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. These tools are typically free and have made it possible for anyone to create and share messages with hundreds or even thousands of people.

Here are my suggestions on how to use social media (other than Facebook and Craigslist) to network for your adoption: [...]

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IAG 020: Using an online adoption profile service with Lawrence Morton from

Posted on 15. May, 2014 by .


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Using an online adoption profile serviceIn this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast, we talk about using on online adoption profile service with Lawrence Morton – the founder of America Adopts!

One of the toughest parts of domestic infant adoption is trying to find a match with an expectant mother. The most important tool you need to make a connection is your adoption profile – both printed and online.

In the last episode of the IAG podcast (#19) we spoke with profile designer Madeleine Melcher, who gave great tips to help you create a successful profile. 

Today’s show is all about putting your profile online using a profile service. Our guest on the show is Lawrence Morton. He is an adoptive dad and founder of America Adopts! and Canada Adopts! These online profile services help hopeful adoptive parents connect faster and easier with expectant parents considering adoption.

Lawrence will share his experience and insight about:
1. Why he started America Adopts! – as well as his adoption story.
2. Tips on how you can make a fast and successful match with an expectant mother.
3. How America Adopts! profile services work.

PLUS – you’ll learn about:
  • Why hopeful adoptive families should use an online profile service.
  • What it means to have a service show your profile online.
  • Question #1 from Facebook: How can “big families” who are looking to adopt find a match? (the answer applies to most families).
  • Question #2 from Facebook: How do families who are not using an agency increase their chances of finding a match?
  • Question #3 from Facebook: Is the outreach for singles different than with couples looking to adopt?


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Ask an Adoption Question #2: How do we pick the right adoption agency for us?

Posted on 08. May, 2014 by .


Are you ready for another Ask an Adoption Question? I am!! This is a very fun blog post series – I hope you enjoy it too! (3)

Today’s question comes from Jennifer where she asks about how to pick the right adoption agency.

Hi, Tim
My husband and I are almost done with our home study. We have searched and searched for an agency that meets our criteria. We would like a domestic Caucasian infant, preferably full Caucasian but are willing to accept a mix of Hispanic, or Asian. We are open to gender and have a budget of about $30,000, possibly a little more. We desperately need help finding and agency, not a facilitator or lawyer as soon as possible. We are from Mississippi but it doesn’t matter where we adopt from within the states.
Thank you!
Hi, Jennifer!
Congratulations on your home study progress! Adoption is all about taking the next step on your journey and to keep moving towards your dream of becoming parents. I understand how overwhelming it can be trying to find the right agency – it is a big decision.
You did a great job figuring out your preferences. With what you’ve described, there are plenty of agency choices. You may want to check out the Infant Adoption Guide talk show episode where we talk about the 7 Common mistakes to avoid when selecting an adoption agency.
Here’s how to find the right agency for you:


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IAG 019: How to create a successful adoption profile with Madeleine Melcher [podcast]

Posted on 01. May, 2014 by .


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When it comes to your adoption profile, everything you include should paint a picture of the life you wish to share.  Madeleine Melcher

In domestic infant adoption, the most important tool you have to help you get a quick match with an expectant mother is your adoption profile. Recently I wrote an article showing you 9 places to get your profile professionally designed.

9 Adoption Profile Design & Creation Services

On this episode of the Infant Adoption Guide Podcast, we chat with Madeleine Melcher – one of the designers from that article. She has a very unique perspective in the adoption world. She is an adoptee and also an adoptive mom of three.

Madeleine’s website is – which is dedicated to designing adoption profiles. She has helped lots of hopeful adoptive parents since 2005. Her unique designs have led some of her clients to be chosen within a few days after they’ve completed their profiles and were being presented to expectant parents.

Her latest book How to Create a Successful Adoption Portfolio: Easy Steps to Help You Produce the Best Adoption Profile and Prospective Birthparent Letter, was just released in 2014. She shares the secrets she has discovered over years of creating successful portfolios, profiles and prospective birth parent letters. [...]

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